Every December, Lagos comes alive. The music, the outfits, the “we outside” energy. Detty December is the season when the whole city remembers how to have fun.
And every December, mothers watch it happen from the sidelines.
If that’s you — scrolling through other people’s Detty December while heating a midnight feed, in yesterday’s clothes, in a house that smells like cereal and baby soap — this is for you.
Somewhere along the way, we quietly agreed that once a woman becomes a mother, she doesn’t get to go outside anymore. Not really. Not without three layers of permission, a reason that sounds selfless, and a suitcase of guilt packed by everybody, including herself.
But here’s the truth nobody says out loud: you were HER before the children, and you are still HER now. Motherhood changed your schedule. It did not delete the woman.
A night out isn’t an escape from your children. It’s a return to yourself. When was the last time you danced without checking the time? Laughed until you snorted with women who know exactly what your life is like? Wore an outfit that had nothing to do with spit-up and everything to do with how fine you feel?
That’s not indulgence. That’s maintenance. A mother who is poured into is not a luxury for her family — she’s a better version of the woman they love.
And you don’t have to wait for permission. The girls are easy to find — you just need a room where mothers plan nights out like they’re normal, because they are. Search it on MomCircleNG and find mothers who’ve been counting down to a proper night out since the school run started — or post in the circle and watch the plans form in minutes. This December, we’re making it official: Detty December: Moms Only, our moms-only afternoon in Victoria Island, Lagos on 17 December — good music, good women, zero mom duties for one day. Details and tickets are on the events page inside the app.
Deactivate mom mode for an afternoon. Put on all shades of brown. Go and be HER.
You’re not meant to do this alone — and you’re not meant to do it all the time, either.
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